This year marks the end of another chapter, and as part of my annual reflection, I dedicate this piece to the myriad experiences and insights that 2023 has gifted me. After concluding the previous year feeling overwhelmed, I entered 2023 with apprehension and uncertainty about what lay ahead. Surprisingly, the year flew by, and here we are.

If I were to encapsulate 2023 in a single word, it would be Acceptance. In the prior year, I found myself resisting and trying to alter my circumstances. However, this year, I consciously chose to embrace acceptance. I acknowledged that many facets of my life remain imperfect—some are fractured, some are vacant, and others are lost. I recognized that numerous resolutions from the past year remain unfulfilled, some even untouched. I accepted that my life in the Netherlands would never mirror that of home and that I had taken an extended hiatus from various activities, including writing. Ultimately, acceptance allowed me to understand life beyond pain and challenges, redirecting my focus to what I can influence.

Here are the twelve key lessons I gleaned this year:

1. Some friends and family will depart, regardless of your desire for them to stay.

   One of my greatest fears about moving abroad was being forgotten, gradually fading from the memories of those I cherish. I pride myself on being loyal to my friends and family, yet in 2023, I mourned the absence of those who once formed my support system. From monthly catch-ups to simply liking each other's posts on social media, the changes were stark. The pain of this realization was profound, yet it taught me to cherish those who chose to remain in my life.

2. Companionship does not alleviate loneliness.

   Last year, I reflected on how isolating living abroad can be, leading many to seek companionship as a remedy for loneliness. However, I discovered that the root of my loneliness stemmed from not liking myself. Engaging with others when you’re not at peace with yourself can be disheartening. I learned that overcoming loneliness begins with self-acceptance and self-love, ultimately leading to a more enjoyable experience when alone.

3. Physical health requires mindfulness regarding what you consume.

   This year, I achieved my best health in four years, leading me to ponder why illness is less frequent in the Netherlands. Unlike my home country, where remedies are often chemical-based, I realized that the locals prioritize nutritious food. I learned that a diet rich in fruits and vegetables strengthens the immune system and promotes balance. In short, maintaining health is about incorporating natural colors into your meals and minimizing processed items.

4. Shift your focus from losing weight to building strength.

   The pandemic left me with unhealthy habits, and I mistakenly believed losing weight was the solution. However, early this year, I decided to prioritize strength over thinness. By investing in a yoga mat and dumbbells, I learned that replacing fat with muscle is the most effective way to lose weight, improving my posture and overall well-being in the process.

5. The source of your discomfort may not be the actual issue.

   My chiropractor highlighted that pain in one area often indicates an issue elsewhere in the body. This analogy resonates with life’s challenges; if you feel ‘pain,’ don’t assume you are to blame. Sometimes, external factors contribute to our struggles. I learned to seek assistance and fresh perspectives to address my discomfort.

6. Invest in a space you can truly call home.

   This year, I faced the challenge of relocating due to unforeseen circumstances. Finding an apartment during a housing crisis proved daunting. Although my previous place was adequate, it lacked the warmth of home. I chose to invest in a space that offered comfort and a sense of belonging, despite the higher cost, and it turned out to be one of my best decisions.

7. Let go of the need to control the uncontrollable.

   A lack of control often leads me to anxiety, which brings out my worst self. I realized that I was creating unnecessary stress by setting unrealistic expectations for myself. A friend reminded me that it’s okay to be slow, and I learned to focus on what I can manage, allowing myself grace during the process.

8. Sharing joy enhances it.

   This year, I rekindled my love for cooking and baking, hosting friends for feedback that evolved into delightful gatherings. I discovered that sharing my culinary creations brought immense joy, reinforcing the idea that happiness multiplies when shared.

9. Problem-solving can be a lesson in patience, like a jigsaw puzzle.

   I took up jigsaw puzzles this year, learning that the simplest approach is often the most effective. Tackling problems piece by piece can reveal the bigger picture and make overwhelming challenges manageable.

10. Pursue your passions and give back.

    My career began as a high school student following my passion for design. Now, I’m grateful for the opportunity to do what I love daily. I’ve learned the importance of contributing back to the community and sharing knowledge, whether through articles, mentorship, or discussions.

11. Struggles do not disqualify you from good things.

    I recognized a tendency to affirm negativity during tough times, allowing minor setbacks to overshadow my day. I learned to view struggles as opportunities for growth and to take care of myself amidst challenges.

12. Celebrate small victories.

    Finally, 2023 reminded me to acknowledge even the tiniest achievements. From traveling to new countries to completing personal goals, each win contributed to my sense of fulfillment as I reflect on the year.

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