# Reflections on Loss: Lessons from My Uncle's Passing
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Chapter 1: A Call in the Night
About a month ago, at the stroke of midnight, my mother's phone rang. It was my cousin, and his distressed voice filled the line with fear. He informed my mother that my uncle—her eldest brother—was in the ICU due to a stroke. The doctors had given a grim prognosis, indicating he might never regain consciousness.
My mother quickly made plans to return home, and the news hit me like a cold wave the following day when I arrived. The air was frigid as we reached the hospital, where my youngest uncle awaited us outside the ICU. Visiting was not permitted, and the waiting room was filled with relatives hoping for good news. My cousins were absent, busy preparing for the inevitable.
In my hometown, there’s a tradition that discourages allowing a person to pass away far from home or in a hospital. The hospital had issued a critical illness notice, indicating my uncle would not recover. In the early hours, we brought him back to the house he had lived in for 62 years.
Here’s a video capturing the moments of the funeral. My uncle's granddaughter, still a young girl, seemed to be unaware of the gravity of the situation.
Reflecting on my past, I remember losing my grandfather and not fully understanding it at the time. I gradually came to realize that the man who used to carry me around was no longer there.
Medical Insights
Though I am not a medical expert, the series of health crises my family faced in 2023 taught me valuable lessons.
Avoid Smoking
My uncle was a heavy smoker during my childhood, consuming more than ten cigarettes a day. Although he quit later, the damage from years of smoking lingers. The evidence linking smoking to severe health issues is overwhelming. It reduces life expectancy and increases the risk of numerous diseases. As the saying goes, "Smoking not only harms the smoker but also those around them."
Limit Alcohol Consumption
My uncle enjoyed drinking, particularly strong liquors like baijiu. Despite previous hospitalizations related to his health, he continued to drink secretly. His last week included attending a wedding where he drank, potentially contributing to his stroke. Please, for your sake and your family's, consider cutting back on alcohol.
Regular Blood Pressure Monitoring
High blood pressure can lead to strokes, yet my uncle, like many older adults, held misconceptions about health. He believed that if he felt fine, he must be healthy, and that medication alone was sufficient. Many health conditions, including hypertension, don’t show clear symptoms early on. Regular check-ups can prevent serious issues.
Seek Medical Attention Promptly
Neighbors recounted that my uncle exhibited stroke symptoms days before being hospitalized, but he delayed seeking help. Many elders avoid visiting doctors unless absolutely necessary, often due to financial concerns. Early intervention can significantly improve outcomes, so please don’t hesitate to seek medical advice when feeling unwell.
Life Lessons
Beyond medical insights, I gleaned important life lessons from this experience.
The Importance of Financial Security
My uncle's smoking habit stemmed partly from the stresses of farming, a profession with long hours and low pay. Financial strain can lead to poor health choices and discourage seeking medical help. It’s a harsh reality: money matters more than we often acknowledge.
Treasure Time with Loved Ones
“You may have already had your last encounter with many people.” This saying resonates deeply with me now. The last time I saw my uncle, I had no idea it would be our final meeting. Life is unpredictable; cherish every moment with loved ones.
Capture Daily Moments
About six years ago, I came across the idea of taking a photo each day. This practice has given me a treasure trove of memories. For instance, one of my most cherished photos is from January 2020, just before the pandemic, capturing my uncle clearing snow. Document your life; it will become a priceless collection of memories.
The Fascination with AI
With advancements in AI, I hope to use the photographs and memories of my uncle to create a digital version of him. I also aspire to document my life so that, when I pass, others can create a digital version of me.
Final Thoughts
I wish for everyone to prioritize their health and happiness!